I have finally lost it with this damn hand. It has done nothing but cause me mental anguish and physical pain for the past three months. I have invested a total of $3000 dollars into getting it "fixed", and can still barely move it.
After waiting in the office for two fucking hours for my doctor to come see me, I finally lost it and just marched right out the door. I even threw the chart in the doctor's face as he watched me walk out (he was flirting with a receptionist instead of tending to patients.) I wonder if he is sad that he couldn't peddle more useless surgeries to me today.
My husband thinks I am crazy, but I want my hand amputated. (No, I am not drunk, and I am also not joking). The brace I wear every night hasn't allowed me decent night's sleep due to the pain it causes, and my useless, numb fingers do nothing but get in the way. My physical therapist warned that I might lose all use of my hand anyway, so why not just cut the damn thing off? Prosthetics are so high-tech these days... they actually have sensors that detect muscle and tendon motion in your arm and give you a semi-functional "hand". I am going to see a specialist next week to see if I can get the ball rolling in that direction.
Our maybe I should just get a hand-hook instead? What does everyone think? A hook would be kinda fun... It would eliminate the annual Halloween costume decision (Mel-o-Pirate!), and I will have a convenient place to hang my car keys. Dark alleys will no longer be haunted with the usual element of danger, for who would want to fuck with a six-foot-tall bitch with a hook?
I am so tired....
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